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Monthly Archive for April, 2013

AMILIA: Daddy, what does “Weigh Upon” mean? ME: It means you’re really worried about something. Like, “Whether or not you’ll go to college really weighs upon me.” AMILIA: Oh. So why do we sing, “I will weigh upon the Lord”? ME: No, Sweetie. That’s WAIT. “I will WAIT upon the Lord,” not “I’ll WEIGH upon […]

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Cash Withdrawal

GIDEON (AGE 6): Daddy, can I borrow your phone? ME: Sure. GIDEON: Thank you. (Plays on the phone awhile) . . . Daddy, can you please send this to the bank for me?

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Hey! Sexy, Lady!

GIDEON (Age 6): Daddy, is sexy a bad word? ME: No. Why do you ask? GIDEON: Because I was singing that song, “Hey, Sexy Lady!” [Psy’s “Gangnam Style”] and someone told me that “sexy” was a bad word. ME: It’s not a bad word. I think Mommy is sexy. GIDEON: EWWWWWW!!! ME: Do you know […]

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Prayer Cakes

GIDEON (AGE 6): Daddy, can I have a piece of cake? ME: No, you already had too many sweets today. GIDEON: Please! ME: No, not today. GIDEON: PLEASE!!! ME: I said no. GIDEON: BUT I WANT CAKE! (Raises his right hand above his head) ME: Gideon, do you think hitting me would be a good […]

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Amilia’s Golden Rule

GIDEON (AGE6): Mommy, Amilia hit me! KIM: Amilia, why did you hit Gideon? AMILIA (AGE 10): Because he hit me first. KIM: That’s not an excuse. Always follow the Golden Rule! AMILIA: I did! KIM: No, you didn’t. The Golden Rule say, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” It doesn’t […]

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Dandruff Drama

AMILIA (Age 11): Daddy, do you want to use this dandruff shampoo? ME: Why do I need dandruff shampoo? I don’t have dandruff. AMILIA: Because it says right here on the bottle, “Use to restore beautiful hair.” I think she just called me bald.

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Grief’s Dichotomy April 2013

Grief’s Dichotomy April 2013 by George Galdiano “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” – Acts 20:35 During his birth, Rick Hoyt went from being a perfectly normal and healthy baby to a spastic quadriplegic with cerebral palsy within minutes because of an umbilical cord accident. Experts advised his parent to institutionalize Rick […]

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Meowiage

ME: Amilia, did you hear Susie’s dad is getting married? GIDEON (AGE 6): What? That’s horrible! That’s just wrong! I can’t believe it! That should be illegal! What’s next? Dogs getting married? ME: What’s wrong with Susie’s dad getting married? GIDEON: Oh! Susie’s DAD! I thought you said Susie’s CAT! Personally, I think if two […]

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The Best Gift Ever

KIM: Gideon, will you please pick that empty bag off the floor? GIDEON: I can’t because it reminds me of the best gift ever! KIM: Why is that? GIDEON: Because it’s empty! KIM: And how does that remind you of the best gift ever? GIDEON: It reminds me that Jesus is with me even though […]

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How to Rule the World

GIDEON: Daddy, why does General Zod (from Superman), kill people? ME: Because he wants to rule the world. GIDEON: That’s horrible! ME: I know. . . (I’m So proud of his tender heart). GIDEON: He shouldn’t do that! ME: I know. (What a sweet compassionate boy I have. . .) GIDEON: I can’t believe he would do […]

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