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Monthly Archive for September, 2013

(Eating Dinner) GIDEON: Daddy, can I have some Kryptonite? ME: You want Kryptonite? GIDEON: Yea! ME: Uh, well . . . I don’t think they have that here. GIDEON: Yes, they do. It’s right there! ME: Where? GIDEON: Right there in the salad bowl! ME: . . . OH! You want CRUTONS! GIDEON: Yea! I […]

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Fortune Cookie

Gideon’s fortune cookie today: “You liven any conversation.” I think the cookie nailed it.

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Christmas Play Tryouts

AMILIA: Daddy, can I try out for the Christmas play? GIDEON (AGE 6): I want to try out too! ME: You both can try out. GIDEON: Yea! AMILIA: But what if only one of us makes it? GIDEON: Well, that would be OK, Sissy. You could always try out again next year.

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That’s a Big Boy

Gideon went to the doctor’s office for his 6-year-old checkup. He’s 54″ tall and 75 lbs, which means in 1.5 years, he has grown 5.5″ and gained 17 lbs. Even though he has always been off the charts in height and weigh, the doctor was still surprised at how much he has grown. Just for […]

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Disposable Thumbs!

AMILIA (AGE 11): Daddy, do you know how my hands are different from a dog’s paw? ME: Uh, no. How? AMILIA: I have disposable thumbs! (I hope she meant opposable.)

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What Did I Do Wrong?

For a long time, I wondered what I did wrong. What did I do to deserve the death of my daughter? Was God punishing me for some unknown sin? Was He trying to teach me a lesson? Make me a better person? Was I a murderer in a previous life? Did I build up so […]

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ME: Amilia and Gideon, what would you like to eat lunch today? GIDEON: CiCi’s Pizza! ME: That’s terrible pizza. I’d rather buy a frozen pizza that we cook at home than east CiCi’s Pizza. GIDEON: Yea, that’s true. it’s so bad, I’d rather have Mommy’s cooking! AMILIA: I’m not that desperate! (Kim makes wonderful desserts, […]

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Future Billionaire

AMILIA (Age 11): Daddy, will I or Gideon get your money when you and mommy die? ME: The one who is the nicest to me gets it all. AMILIA: What if you were in the hospital, and I visited you every day and helped pay your bills? GIDEON (Age 6): What if I was a […]

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Not in Any Dimension

GIDEON (AGE 6): Daddy, this closet is a gateway to another dimension! ME: It is? GIDEON: Yea! I’m going to go to another dimension and another Gideon is going to take my place here. ME: OK, but please send back a Gideon that is a big boy who eats his vegetables and listens to his […]

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